Twilight Messes up a Spell, Gets a Human
by lollerblade509
Summary: Twilight Messes up a Spell, Gets a Human named Mary Sue in Equestria, Starts a War, and Viciously Murders Everypony except Rainbow Dash, Whose Wings She Clips Before Realizing that I am Her True Love  GRIMDARK  SHIPPING  HUMAN-IN-EQUESTRIA  OC  CROSSOVER
1. Prologue

Twilight Messes up a Spell, Gets a Human named Mary Sue in Equestria, Starts a War, and Viciously Murders Everypony except Rainbow Dash, Whose Wings She Clips Before Realizing that I am Her True Love [GRIMDARK][SHIPPING][HUMAN-IN-EQUESTRIA][OC][CROSSOVER][GORE][COMPLETE]

_by G-Money_

Prologue

My name is Gary. Gary Stu. I recently embarked on a wonderful journey to the land of Equestria, and it is my duty – no, my obligation – to share my tale with you. I do hope that you profit from my experiences so that you may avoid the follies of those around me and benefit from the enlightening wisdom I now possess. It is my pleasure to share with you my knowledge. (Based on Cupcakes, this story is a tale of a young male who ventures into the world of Equestria, confronts his past sins, and changes Equestria forever.)


	2. Chapter 1

Twilight Messes up a Spell, Gets a Human named Mary Sue in Equestria, Starts a War, and Viciously Murders Everypony except Rainbow Dash, Whose Wings She Clips Before Realizing that I am Her True Love [GRIMDARK][SHIPPING][HUMAN-IN-EQUESTRIA][OC][CROSSOVER][GORE][COMPLETE]

_by G-Money_

Chapter 1

"It should get 20% cooler in 10 seconds flat today," announced the weatherpony to the crowd.

Twilight Sparkle sighed. The temperature had dropped for 12 days straight, plunging Ponyville into a premature winter.

"I can't understand what's happening, Spike," she said to her young dragon assistant. "Not a single one of my books explains these abnormal meteorological tendencies."

"Aw, don't worry, Twilight," replied Spike in a comforting tone. I'm sure it's just some pegasi over on the other side of Equestria who did their Winter Wrap-Up a little early this year, and it's coming our way."

"I don't think so, Spike. Never in Equestrian history has the temperature dropped so rapidly."

"Well, you did write that letter to the Princess. I'm sure she'll know what's going on!"

"Spike, that was over a week ago! I'm really starting to get worried now. That's it. I'll go see the Princess myself!"

And with that, Twilight summoned her magical unicorn powers. She had been practicing teleportation for months, but she had never tried teleporting herself to Canterlot before. "Here goes," she said hopefully as she closed her eyes and conjured the magic within.

Charlie Smith was just an average teenager. He played video games, attended high school, and played football. He was a rather large male with menacing green eyes and thick black hair that he gelled upward. He spent his free time picking on the smaller kids at his school, and when he came home each day after football practice, he occupied himself with a daily round of a game he liked to call "Beat up Sally until she cries." Sally was his 4 year-old sister who spent her days watching a television program called "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic."

Charlie had just returned from practice when his sister ran into his room. "Chuck, guess what! In the newest episode-"

Her sentence was interrupted by a swift punch to the jaw, which rendered her incapable of speaking. She spun ninety degrees before falling unconsciously to the floor, smacking her fragile head against the hardwood flooring.

"I told you never to mention those horses again!" shouted Charlie at the body, which was beginning to excrete blood. "I don't ever want to hear you mention that show again! I hate horses, I hate ponies, and if I could, I'd kill 'em all!"

Charlie's words were genuine; his dislike of the children's television show had evolved into a swirling vortex of hate. The neurological reaction to a single thought of the show provoked a thrashing rage, oftentimes one that he would take out on his sister. He lifted his foot off of the bed and kicked Sally in the face, unaware of the fact that he still had not yet removed his football cleats. The metal spikes from his footwear wedged themselves into newfound crevices on the child's visage, commencing the creation of a multitude of blood wells.

Charlie stared in disbelief at the sight before him. While he routinely assaulted his sister, he had never before seen this amount of blood. The nimble-minded fool entered a state of panic; his blood, replete with adrenaline, proceeded to lift the young girl's body and toss it out of the second-story window.

"What was that noise?" called his mother up the stairs.

"Oh, it was nothing, mother," replied Charlie. He was skilled in the art of deception, able to lie without once questioning the moral depravity of his words and deeds.

He glanced out of his window and into the front yard to find his sister's body, face down in a pool of blood. Her legs were mangled in a fashion that confirmed her departure from the world of the living.

Charlie saw what he had done and felt no regret. This sick monster only felt fear. _I've got to run from the cops_, he thought. He bolted from his room and descended the stairs, shoving his mother to the floor and sprinting out the front door.

He had run past several houses before bumping into the head cheerleader of his town's high school, Mary Sue. Ostensibly, Mary Sue had it all: a plethora of friends, more than a fair share of brains, and long blonde hair. She was walking home from school when she saw Charlie sprinting towards her.

"Woah Charlie, what's the rush for?"

"I just killed my sister," replied the ugly dimwit.

Mary Sue released a light chuckle, although she was slightly wary. Had anyone else told her this, she would have been heartily amused by the ridiculousness of the statement; however, Charlie was known for his cruelty, and Mary Sue couldn't be sure whether or not he was joking around.

"Oh, really?" started Mary in a sardonic tone. "Then where did you hide the body?"

"I didn't!" shouted a clearly panicked Charlie. "I left it right on the front lawn! You've got to help me! I need to get away from here!"

Mary was beginning to worry. The sincerity of Charlie's voice was deeply troubling, but not even he could be dumb enough to openly reveal a felony of this magnitude. …right?

Mary tried to think of a polite answer that would excuse her from the conversation so that she could alert the proper authorities. "Um, well then Charlie, I wish the best for you, and I wish that you can escape this situation without having to face the consequences. This is a very serious crime!" Mary ended her conversation lightheartedly, pretending not to believe Charlie in case he planned to kill her, too.

Before Mary could step away, however, a bright cloud of purple dust encompassed the two humans. Mary shut her eyes and let out a shriek, but the noise became muffled and distorted. Her body was changing. Her vocal cords no longer carried the frequency of human beings.

When she opened her eyes, she immediately saw that something had changed. Her environment had been radically altered, the temperature had radically dropped, and she was suddenly in the midst of a large crowd.

But those were the least of her problems. She looked at herself and gasped in horror. Not only was her environment strange, but…she was strange.

She was now a pony.


	3. Chapter 2

Twilight Messes up a Spell, Gets a Human named Mary Sue in Equestria, Starts a War, and Viciously Murders Everypony except Rainbow Dash, Whose Wings She Clips Before Realizing that I am Her True Love [GRIMDARK][SHIPPING][HUMAN-IN-EQUESTRIA][OC][CROSSOVER][GORE][COMPLETE]

_by G-Money_

Chapter 2

The cloud of smoke cleared, but Twilight wasn't in Canterlot's Royal Palace. In fact, she hadn't moved at all.

"Gosh, that's strange," she said with a puzzled look on her face. "I've never messed up a spell like this before!"

Spike gently poked Twilight in the leg. "Um, Twilight, I think you teleported them here," he explained as he pointed towards a colt and pony standing before them. "They weren't here a second ago."

Twilight looked at the newcomers. The colt was colored a deep black with a red mane and a skull-and-bones for a cutie mark. The pony was an white alicorn with a light yellow mane. Her cutie mark depicted the galaxy, with planets orbiting in perfect harmony.

"Wow, I've never seen that before!" remarked Twilight. "The only alicorns I've ever met before are the two Princesses! Are you a princess from a distant land?"

"Oh no, I'm not a princess. But, um, where am I?"

"I'm so sorry! I should've introduced myself," replied a blushing Twilight. "My name is Twilight Sparkle, and this here is Ponyville! We're glad you could come to our emergency meeting on the weather problem we've been having lately. Would you happen to know anything about it?"

"Shut up!" snapped the black colt. "Go die, you stupid pony."

"Don't mind him, Twilight Sparkle," explained the beautiful alicorn. "Charlie get angry sometimes. My name is Mary Sue, and I have no idea how I got here."

"I'm Spike, and it's nice to meet you," said the young dragon. "But I think Twilight here messed up a spell, and it must've teleported you guys here."

"Teleport? Oh dear!" gasped Mary. "This is one awfully strange dream I'm having. Charlie must've knocked me out or something."

"This isn't a dream, Mary," replied Twilight in a comforting tone. "I know this must be difficult for you to be in a new environment far away from home, but I promise I'll do my best to teleport you back."

Mary looked at the unicorn in disbelief. _What is happening to me? Why am I a pony? This can't be real. There's no way this is actually happening to me._

"Would you happen to be from Canterlot, by any chance?"

"Um, no. I don't even know what Canterlot is. We're from Irving, Kansas."

"Oh, I've never heard of that place, before! I guess I should do more reading on geography." Twilight turned to Spike. "Spike, remind me to read a geography book when we return to the library today."

When Spike didn't respond, Twilight noticed that he was staring at the new colt. Twilight looked over to see, and it was screaming viciously. The crowd was frantically dispersing, causing a scene of chaos and destruction.

"How did I not notice this?" thought Twilight aloud.

"It's because you had a lampshade over your head, silly!" cried Pinkie Pie.

"When did you get here! And why are you holding a lampshade!"

"I've been here this whole time!"

"Why is that colt screaming?"

"It looks like he's stuck in the ground. Those things he has on his feet have little spikes on the bottom of them."

"How do you know that, Pinkie?"

The pink earth pony simply shrugged and put the lampshade over her head. She then proceeded to make ghost noises and walk towards Sugarcube Corner.

"Well, that was strange," commented Spike.

Twilight cast a quick look at the scene before returning to Spike. "We need to find a way to get this colt out of here!"

"Try teleporting him back," Spike suggested.

"Okay."

Twilight concentrated on summoning her magical unicorn powers, but the clamor of the crowd disrupted her focus. Instead of sending away Charlie, she instead brought two new figures into Ponyville.

One was a blue hedgehog who immediately began darting around. He suddenly jumped into the air and collided with Rainbow Dash, who was just arriving to investigate the source of commotion.

"I love you," professed the hedgehog. "Will you love me?" He held out a rose towards the pegasus and raised an eyebrow.

"Um, no thanks, creep," retorted Rainbow Dash. Before she had finished her sentence, she felt a sharp pain in her sides. Attempting to retreat to the clouds, she soon realized that her wings had been sliced off.

"No! Not my wings!" cried Rainbow Dash.

The hedgehog chuckled. "Now you can't escape from me, my love."

The blue pegasus began running towards the hedgehog, who darted away. After a brief silence, the other newcomer spoke.

"My name is Merriam Webster," began a small spider. "Why is everything bigger and eight?"

"This is getting too weird!" yelled Twilight. She quickly began working on another spell, but her focus was so shattered that she accidentally the whole Equestria.

"Oh no. Equestria is gone."

The Fallout of the nuclear explosion spared only Twilight, Mary Sue, and the deformed Rainbow Dash. Fluttershy had kissed Applejack in the final moment, and the two shared their last moment in love. On the ground lay a cupcake, the frosting of which was Dash-ed with Rainbow sprinkles. A singular image of Nyx appeared in Luna's moon. It was the End of Ponies. The only noise audible was a faint clop.

The war was over. Peace had been brought to Equestria, and the evil Charlie had been incinerated in the nuclear explosion. The Warhammer 40k and Slendermen were also gone. As there were no longer any other males in Ponyville, I was now free to express my love to Twilight Sparkle.

I walked up to Twilight and said, "I love you." By confronting my fears, I was magically transformed into a pony and then an alicorn. She smiled and we lived happily ever after in perpetual euphoria.


	4. TwilightII:  New Moon

Twilight Messes up a Spell, Gets a Human named Mary Sue in Equestria, Starts a War, and Viciously Murders Everypony except Rainbow Dash, Whose Wings She Clips Before Realizing that I am Her True Love [GRIMDARK][SHIPPING][HUMAN-IN-EQUESTRIA][OC][CROSSOVER][GORE][COMPLETE]

_by G-Money_

Chapter 3

Fluttershy gazed across the valley towards the cascading waterfall. The majestic water tumbled over the cliffside, nesting peacefully in the basin below. A multitude of friendly animals gathered to drink the water, nourishing themselves with the essence of life.

She glanced at the red morning sky, streaked with color as the sun ascended over the horizon. The cool summer air brushed her mane, gently refreshing her with the soft breeze streaming through the valley.

Fluttershy pondered how things had gotten this way. Not long ago, she had been deceased, embraced in a comfortable but solitary postmortem experience of tangible light and idyllic mountainsides. _Not unlike this one_, she thought.

_Aha!_ Finally it started coming back to her. It was Paulina the atom.

You see, the universe had long since ended. As the fortifications of Los Pegasus fell, the apocalyptic fury had challenged even the most noble of warriors, who of course would be me. I was unable to defend my wall of the city.

Twilight too was eschatologically overcome. Not long after I had perished in the fires of haste did the second wall of the impenetrable fortress fall. This collapse downgraded the rating of Los Pegasus from impenetrable to partially penetrable, providing a moral boost for those who opposed our cause.

The third wall was not supported. Its poor showing in recent debates rendered it incapable of upholding public opinion. No one voted for it to remain in office, and an exogenous membrane assumed the position, filling its Cabinet with members of organizations such as Amoebas for Godiva Chocolate and The Lichen Institute for Liking Likings. Rick Ross supervised the investigative committee to determine the prudence of pressing charges, so it comes as no surprise that the lack of judicial aggression preceded the most cataclysmic occurrence since Charlie's entrance into Equestria (Money, 2011).

It was not long before the fourth wall was broken. The denizens of Los Pegasus all looked up into the sky, my readers, in hope of finding someone to support them. I looked at them and condemned them to an early demise, and I destroyed the universe to boot.

But there was an atom. It was a persnickety atom named Paulina, and somehow it decided to collapse. I am not familiar with the neurological capabilities of atomic particles, so this event was rather unprecedented in my limited experience as Supreme Ruler of The Nothingness That Is. The particle's decision rendered my nothingness not, and the blatant floccinaucinihilipilification of my lack of matter ZOMGBBQPIZZA.

Paulina's instability let out a nebulous gas that I unfortunately could not smell due to symptoms related to a common cold. Regardless, this gas was emitted seamlessly and smoothly. The gases inside this nebula conspired against all volition to incept unsightly blobs of matter. These large balls made the most unpleasant hissing sound, the cacophony of which still perturbs me to this day.

The balls were so terrible that they didn't even like themselves. Some of them exploded. The explosions created more artifacts, which millions of years later might be considered valuable due to their Rarity. Fluttershy and Applejack soon followed, and thus Equestria was made. There has been no attempt thus far by revisionist historians to blot out the transitionary stage of the universe from a helio-hydrogenic decentralization to the nascent planetary formation and development.

Ponies lived. Some even died. Others chose to omit this stage entirely.

And then the end ended again.


End file.
